No.

They’re not shooting a bike themed soft core porno movie here in Chicago.

The World Naked Bike Ride Chicago is a real event.

In fact, this Saturday evening’s ride is the 9th year it’s been held in Chicago.

We dutifully called and emailed the contact info listed on the event’s website for more info, but alas no one responded to our inquiries.

So, we had to rely on the organization’s website for the lowdown.

Essentially it’s a protest against the consumption of oil.

You know. Oil. Petroleum.

The stuff that’s converted into gasoline to fuel the cars, trucks and buses to transport people and goods.

The organizers and participants of WNBR Chicago seem to have a problem with it and the people who use it.

How several hundred bikers pedaling approximately 22 miles of Chicago’s streets naked or semi-naked translates into an effective anti-oil message is somewhat puzzling.

But Chicago is just one of many cities around the globe where the event takes place.

Here in the Windy City, riders will amass at “The O”, the large, metallic Oprah Winfrey “O” sculpture at 1025 W. Randolph between 6 and 8 PM Saturday night.

The ride route, much like Critical Mass rides, is not revealed until just before the event steps off at 8 PM, ostensibly to limit the leering of perverts according to the website.

However, ride organizers do reveal a few route locations for spectators and supporters which seems to show a route that runs through River North up through Lincoln Park, Lakeview and Wicker Park.

According to Steve Vance, co-publisher and writer for Grid Chicago, spectators enjoy the spectacle of WNBR Chicago.

“Spectators really do enjoy watching the ride,” laughed Vance who participated in last year’s event.

The ride is scheduled to run from 8 PM to midnight, which will most likely impact Saturday night car traffic in those neighborhoods.

Bike riding, yet fully clothed Chicago police officers will be on the ride to insure the safety of bikers and minimize traffic delays.

Drivers should expect delays if they encounter Naked Bike Riders, but more importantly motorists should resist being distracted by the shock of seeing hundreds of nude people riding bikes down the street.

Nudity induced traffic accidents would be a bad thing.

If you’re considering participating in the ride, here are some tips from organizers.

ABSOLUTELY DO NOT arrive naked. Carry some clothing options.

Exposed goodies may target you for ticketing. Do so at your own risk, or be minimally covered or painted.

For First Amendment protection, maintain the message: “less gas more ass”, “burns fat not oil”, “nude not crude”, “no concealed weapons”, “naked is how vulnerable I am sharing roads with cars”

Check out the World Naked Bike Ride Chicago website for more info.

Cargo Bike Roll Call

Speaking of bicycles…

Avid bike rider Steve Vance will not be participating in this year’s World Naked Bike Ride Chicago because he is hosting his own bike related event Saturday. It’s called Cargo Bike Roll Call event Saturday evening at West Town Bikes from 6-10 PM.

Cargo bikes are specialty bicycles designed to transport children, pets and goods via bike around the city. Vance has lined up sponsors to provide different bikes and components for people to try out as well as beer and spirits for adults as well as crafts and such for kids.

This is the second such event Vance has organized and promises a fun time for all ages.

West Town Bikes is located at 2459 W Division St.

Check out the event’s Facebook page for more info.